Sermons

The One Lesson That Can Absolutely, Positively Improve Your Marriage

Written by Ed Allen
 Saturday, January 19, 2008 07:00

General Sermons

Sermon Notes

Ephesians 5:21-33 (New International Version)

21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives and Husbands

22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church– 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32This is a profound mystery?but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Advice for Wives

The requirement to submit is given to wives

  1. You are to offer submission to your husbands (the standard)
    • Submission not obedience
    • Submission has to do with order and structure
    • It defines relational posture
  2. Submit to him in the same way that you submit to Christ (a model)
  3. Submit to your husband as a way of honoring the Lord (a motivation)
    • You please God by submitting to your husband, because this is consistent with His design for your husband.
    • It is not about power and position but about function and form.
    • It is what your husband needs.
  4. Submit to your husband in everything (the degree)
    • The Bible / this passage does not tell us how. It will look differently to different people.

...Statistics / survey questions from Shaunti Feldhahn's book For Women Only

Advice for Husbands

Husbands are told to love their wives

  1. Love your wife like Christ loved the church (the standard)
    • Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
    • Love is a choice just like what Christ did.
    • It is about laying down your life. You don't take up authority, but it is given to you by God and by your wife.
    • You do this because your wife needs your love.
  2. Love your wife so that you may help make her hold (the goal)
    • The goal isn't to make her happy but to make her holy.
    • Bring the Bible into your marriage (even if you feel inadequate in your knowledge of the Bible)
    • Wash her with the Word.

See For Men Only by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhan

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